02.28.08

Worst day of my life so far..
Most of you have no idea who Czarusia is.. She was my 21 year old black kitty.
She was there my whole life. 2 days before the 28th,she started losing her sight.
It's been maybe 2-3 month's that her hearing was getting worse & worse,but I bought meds for that.. they didin't work as they should of.Exactly 2 weeks before the 28th..I also had to buy medications for her cough - whenever she'd get happy,she'd start breathing faster & faster & that eventually made her cough - Difficulties breathing.
I don't blame her.. she has lived a pretty long life. Normally,cats live 9-15 years.

When she was 18-19.. I was always telling my older brother how if she's EVER sick & is
suffering,we should get meds & if that doesnt work,then putting her down would be the best for her. The day of the 28th.I cried. And it wasn't the ordinary crying.
It was the crying where you feel so empty inside & can't even talk because you're too weak to make the slightest move.

I got to the vet thursday at 10;15.. They made me wait 2 hours.
I let her walk around the place for a while.. then for the rest of the time,I was holding her in my hands,she fell aleep. 15 minutes before the vet called us in.. she woke up,looked at me straight in the eyes & started purring. It was the pet-me-please kind of stare.I couldn't look at her without having a tear or two . I guess the fact that she was struggling & started purring - made me realize that maybe what she wanted to tell me by that was to thank me for doing the right choice for her.

Petting her was all it took to make her happy.
1 week'ish later [now].. I'm really happy about the decision I made.
I strongly believe it's the best gift I could of ever offered her.

I miss you <3.